Classes on etiquette may be needed again
Lauren Wickboldt
Issue date: 11/2/06 Section: Opinions
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Over Family Weekend my parents and I were fortunate enough to encounter a new species of Smithie in her own habitat. We were having a nice calm brunch in one of the houses when we spotted her - using both hands, without utensils, to shovel food into her mouth. She then proceeded to bend down to her plate of food to take a bite out of her coffee cake in order to avoid straining her arm muscles. Luckily, we were finished with our food already because between laughing hysterically and being completely disgusted, there was no way any of us were going to take another bite.
Having discovered this new species, I have a recommendation for Smith College: please, please, please, someone teach these people some etiquette. Smithies today laugh when the old etiquette classes are mentioned. They covered table manners, how to be a hostess, small talk, party etiquette and the like. But maybe these "classes" weren't such a bad thing. Flash forward five decades and people are still judged on their etiquette. While you may not realize it, when your potential boss takes you out to lunch for your interview, he or she is testing you. You may not like the reality of it, but no one is going to hire you if you are going to embarrass the company when you have to take a client out to a nice dinner to schmooze them.
Beyond business, I would rather not go to a school famous for students who perpetually embarrass themselves in public because of their habits. Nobody is suggesting that you need to learn how to make a perfect quiche and stand by your hypothetical husband when his boss comes home for dinner. However, there will be a time when you have to step out of this little Smith bubble, and when you do, you are going to have to know that it is rude not to bring a hostess gift and what each piece of silverware is for when there is more than just a fork, a spoon and a knife. Actually, that would probably be a good place to start since so many Smithies don't bother to use even these three basic instruments.
No one likes taking etiquette classes because no one likes being told that they are wrong and that they have to stand up straight and cross their legs at the ankle and butter each piece of bread individually when it would be much easier to just do it all at once. But those of us who were taught proper etiquette either by our parents or by our parents forcing us to go to lessons that involved old women and fancy tea times appreciate the value of such lessons and are appalled, whether you like or not, at the way people at this school eat. The next time you are eating with those disgusting habits, and the people at the next table are hysterically laughing, assume it's you they are laughing at and pick up a damn fork.
Having discovered this new species, I have a recommendation for Smith College: please, please, please, someone teach these people some etiquette. Smithies today laugh when the old etiquette classes are mentioned. They covered table manners, how to be a hostess, small talk, party etiquette and the like. But maybe these "classes" weren't such a bad thing. Flash forward five decades and people are still judged on their etiquette. While you may not realize it, when your potential boss takes you out to lunch for your interview, he or she is testing you. You may not like the reality of it, but no one is going to hire you if you are going to embarrass the company when you have to take a client out to a nice dinner to schmooze them.
Beyond business, I would rather not go to a school famous for students who perpetually embarrass themselves in public because of their habits. Nobody is suggesting that you need to learn how to make a perfect quiche and stand by your hypothetical husband when his boss comes home for dinner. However, there will be a time when you have to step out of this little Smith bubble, and when you do, you are going to have to know that it is rude not to bring a hostess gift and what each piece of silverware is for when there is more than just a fork, a spoon and a knife. Actually, that would probably be a good place to start since so many Smithies don't bother to use even these three basic instruments.
No one likes taking etiquette classes because no one likes being told that they are wrong and that they have to stand up straight and cross their legs at the ankle and butter each piece of bread individually when it would be much easier to just do it all at once. But those of us who were taught proper etiquette either by our parents or by our parents forcing us to go to lessons that involved old women and fancy tea times appreciate the value of such lessons and are appalled, whether you like or not, at the way people at this school eat. The next time you are eating with those disgusting habits, and the people at the next table are hysterically laughing, assume it's you they are laughing at and pick up a damn fork.
Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Diane Caulk
posted 11/03/06 @ 12:50 PM EST
I work here in ever so polite Massachusetts with a few women from Uganda. When we have had dinner together, they let me know that in Uganda, it is customary for them to eat with their hands without utensils. (Continued…)
Marie
posted 12/30/06 @ 2:11 AM EST
I have a lot of issues with this article. Firstly just because someone eats differently does not give you the right to call them a "specie" and secondly it is very snobby to flaunt your little rich girl up bringing at people. (Continued…)
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